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The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission  has released federal guidelines with respect to the enforcement of laws protecting pregnant women from discrimination and allowing for their  accommodation in the workplace.  The new guidelines are as follows:   An employer may not ask a post-menopausal obese woman her due date even if it's funny. Pregnant women must be allowed as many breaks to the bathroom as necessary to pee, vomit and cry for no reason. A pregnant woman may have ... [click here to read more]
10 Ways to Get Ready for Your New Semester of Law School    Detox. Drink lots of water to dilute the alcohol in your system. Lots of water. Gallons.  Sleep. Sleep a lot. You won’t be sleeping much so store up your zzzzs.  Carbo load. Carbohydrates give you energy. Eat lots of pasta, Cheez Its, Ramen, Ritz Bits and Oreos. Don’t stop. You can’t stop anyway.  Eat protein. Do this so you can tell your mother you ate protein.  Practice reading. Face it. You haven’t read ... [click here to read more]
  Did you ever dream of being a partner at a major New York law firm but couldn't even get your foot in the door as an associate? Well, dream no more. Senior partners at the top 10 law firms in New York City met this week and agreed that where you went to school and the grades you got are irrelevant. They have come to the conclusion that it's all about your eyebrows. Your eyebrows? Yes, at least according to these erudite lawyers who have spent precious years skimming the cream from the ... [click here to read more]
New Courses to be Offered by Law Schools by Joan Weisblatt In survey after survey, law school students complain that their courses are of no interest to them. From Admiralty to Wills, Trusts & Estates, students think that the coursework has little or no practical application. At a time when law school enrollment is at an all-time low, law school administrations feel that they cannot sit idly by waiting to reignite interest in the courses that were once the hallmark of an excellent legal education. ... [click here to read more]
These haikus may bring back memories, be your reality or haunt your future!!   It must be precise I work late into the night Over the word “the”   My billable rate Will never reach my pocket What was I thinking?   My boss has a house On the isle of Nantucket I hope it burns down   Today is Sunday I could die in my desk chair At least I came in   My girlfriend is late No, I don’t mean for dinner Who ... [click here to read more]
  I’ve never shopped at Hobby Lobby and I don’t intend to start now. I am angry with  the company's refusal to acknowledge women’s reproductive health. Also,  I have no idea what to do with dried leaves, a bolt of cloth and a bunch of pipe cleaners.  To say I’m not happy with the U.S Supreme Court decision--that permits this company to bar insurance coverage  for contraceptives-- is an understatement. I’ve searched my mind to figure out how the esteemed Court, founded on ... [click here to read more]
Sexual harassment in the workplace is as old as the workplace. There are early reports that Cro Magnon man complained of feeling objectified at work when Cro Magnon woman looked down his loincloth. Sexual harassment in modern times may be more subtle, but  no less insidious. Can you spot sexual harassment? Example 1.  Troy Sizemore, male stripper by night, works at a coupon distribution center during the day to make ends meet (one of his more impressive tricks). Among other responsibilities ... [click here to read more]
I am at the bank  and the ATM rejects my checks for deposit  not once, but twice. I immediately suspect that this is a blatant case of anti-Semitism or  maybe the ATM is broken. I go into the bank, explain the problem to the teller and we have the following exchange: Teller:  I am so sorry for the problem. Are you doing anything fun  today? Other Teller:  Bank Employee Handbook page 3- "Never ask the customer a personal question." I:  Yes. I'm meeting my husband's brother at ... [click here to read more]
Now that wasn't so bad, was it?   Now that you've had a chance to digest some of the legal terms you learned last week, here are a few more to ease your next appointment with your lawyer:   Summary judgment-snap decision, ie. Those shoes are ugly. Declaratory judgment-summary judgment expressed with feeling, ie. Those shoes are HIDEOUS! Chapter 12- life after Chapter 11 Arraignment-showers Capital Offense-spelling error Temporary Restraining Order- Darling, ... [click here to read more]
Lawyers can make things so complicated.     Don't FRET! You TOO can speak LEGALESE!  Here are some commonly used legal terms and their meaning:   Pro Bono- transgender friendly Res Ipsa Loquitor- talking the managing  partner into more money Supra- portmanteau for bringing a cause of action against a media powerhouse Et. Seq.- ingesting jury lunch and getting cramps Escheat- Accusing another of dishonest dealings Estop- Latino policeman directing ... [click here to read more]

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